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August 29 News in America - YIKERS!Well, now we've done it. The Democrats finally officially chose Barak
Obama for their presidential candidate. He is being compared to Abraham
Lincoln (from Illinois, one stint in Congress, against a popular war,
etc). I don't know if he's debated Frederick Douglass, but it could be
coming. Barak is the American child of an American single mother and
despite what his parents named him (wait, Hillary? The guy who climbed
Mount Everest?) no one can deny him his citizenship. And he chose for a running mate the half-orphaned son of a man who gave up his political office to raise his motherless children after a tragic car accident took half his family- Joe Biden. And Biden has actually done the legwork McCain claims to have done. And he adds the experience and maturity to the ticket the Republicans have railed about since Obama began running. Can't complain about that. On the other hand, John McCain, or "Bush Lite" as we like to call him, couldn't FIND an elder statesman to be his running mate. He's the oldest game in town. Instead he chose the lovely, forty four year old governess of Alaska Sarah Palin to be his running mate. Now except for being mayor of a small town for a few cold years, Ms. Palin has only served as governess for two years. However, she represents the Great State of Alaska (bigger than Texas and with more oil!) and is also quite a looker, for a human. In fact, when you get John McCain on stage with his lovely wife Cindy on one side and his new Veep on the other there will actually five boobs on the stage! Anyways, to quote CNN.com "She's an ice fisherman, a moose hunter, a small business owner and a lifetime NRA member." And she's the mother of five from the tiny town of Wasilla, Alaska. My heavens, how does she find the time to be Vice President, especially after making her name battling graft and corruption in her own party? Yes, our vice presidential candidate clearly states the Republican party is ridden with graft and corruption. Now who wouldn't want someone like that representing their party. AND should the Republicans win this election there's a good chance that Ms. Sarah will become President Sarah because John McCain is older than DIRT and is a cancer survivor. If he doesn't make it through the next eight years, Miss Congeniality will become our next president. Yes, from the beauty contest. Especially noteworthy is her Amy Winehouse beehive (sans the bottle of Tequila loosely gripped at her side) and her patent pending Marie Osmond smile. Yes, when you look at Sarah Palin know that you are looking at The Woman Who Will Take Over When John McCain Dies. A first-time, mid-term governor. And it'll be the first time we've had a moose hunter in the White House since Teddy Roosevelt! So, until I announce my Veep, that's all the viable political choices available in this country: the O'Binden-Bama ticket the Democrats have offered or the McCain-Palin of the Republicans. (To me it looks like McCain is palin' more and more all the time) Now to the weather. After Hurricane Fay hip-hopped all over Florida and Georgia, we are expecting a visit from Gustav. Most track projections have it hitting New Orleans at a category 3 or better, the same as Hurricane Katrina three years ago today. (hey, wait a minute. What do German hurricanes have against The Big Easy?) Having observed the accuracy of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) I can say with confidence at this time that five days out from landfall this hurricane could easily go anywhere- Louisiana, Houston, Tampa, London, Paris, Chicago, Ottawa, Sidney (and on Southwest Airlines you don't have to pay for your first bag!). Translation: Good weathermen are good guessers. The only good thing about the New Orleans track? Maybe it will wash out all the trash and debris that's still sitting in the Ninth Ward three years after the last hurricane. What is the matter with those people? Only the wealthy get service? Only the places tourists go get fixed? That makes it all about money, doesn't it? Well, even if Gustav blows out a place or two in the Gulf of Mexico, Hannah looks like she might visit with Fay and go up the coast of Florida then the Atlantic seaboard. At this point about the only thing that COULD clean up Washington would be a good hurricane. Of course, the sewers would be clogged with lobbyists and the water would back up. The storm surge up the Potomac would wipe out the poorer parts of town as the low bid projects will crumble due to the substandard materials used. Fortunately, we will lose no one in Congress because, as we know, a hot-air filled bag of gas is extremely buoyant. Still, certain members should begin collecting cabbage right away. Oooo, meow! Well, it's too late to catch you up on the home front. The Morgan went home, The Emily's in a good mood (?), Dad's at work and mom's on alert for Gustav. KK can now get out of his crib, climb over the gate and over the fence in the living room. Is no place sacred? Mom did buy us a new cat tower with three levels and a big tube to hide in. It's right next to the bookcase and she puts our food up there so the dogs can't get it. And Brigid has that "overactive bladder" thing they talk about on TV. I think she needs one of those pipe guys to come and give her some medicine. Enjoy the next sixty-seven days! Perry TrackbacksThe trackback URL for this entry is: http://cato9tales.spaces.live.com/blog/cns!566699174AE57DC3!171.trak Weblogs that reference this entry
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